I'm probably the last person you need giving you parenting advice. I'll admit it.

But what I'm about to say is very important. It behooves you, the responsible Rogue Valley parent, to grant me your undivided attention.

Stop giving your little girls Bratz dolls and start buying them guitars. Or drums. Or a microphone.

You might as well throw some CDs in there to. Start with Patti Smith's "Horses" and L7's "Bricks Are Heavy."

As I listened to The Ovulators, an all-girl glam/punk band out of Eugene, play this weekend at Johnny B's I found myself transported back to the 1990s, a time when we seemed to be on the cusp of a true rock 'n' roll revolution. One that didn't involve wallowing in a mud hole in New York and listening to the likes of Joe Cocker ""shudder""spouting the hypocrisy of freedom through free love.

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For a brief moment last decade, it seemed like the girls were going to rise up and wrest the crown of rock from the boy's club.

Remember Juliana Hatfield? Bikini Kill? How about Tanya Donelly of Belly, Shirley Manson of Garbage, Liz Phair (before she crapped out to the cult of Lindsay Lohan), D'arcy of Smashing Pumpkins, Veruca Salt, Seven Year Bitch, the Breeders, Babes in Toyland and Bratmobile?

It was these hard-rocking women, who hailed from decidedly unsexy places such as Olympia, Minnesota, Chicago and Boston, that roared the Riot Grrl anthem while shoving the hair metal scene back into the sewer ditches along the Sunset Strip from which they spawned.

And then suddenly they were gone, replaced by the wretched likes of Korn, Limp Bizkit, Eminem and — my god it hurts to say this — Paris Hilton. These bands are just more tattooed, and if you can believe it, dumber versions of what came before.

Watching The Ovulators gave me hope. Here were four grrls doing it right. Each sang her own songs, mixing in angry riffs and glitter grooves worthy of David Bowie and T-Rex in their heyday.

If another riot grrl insurgency is just beyond the horizon, it's good to know the Rogue Valley has a few soldiers it can send into war. Check out The Hollowbodys or Ischemia whenever they play a bar in your area. Each boasts a fierce feminine presence and gets better each time I see them.

The Ovulators recently cut their first self-titled CD. It would make a fine stocking stuffer, birthday present and the perfect antidote to the Hilton poison.

Reach reporter Chris Conrad at 776-4471 or cconrad@mailtribune.com